Learning to Love Running:
My interest in health and fitness was truly sparked while I was in my freshman year in college. Basically, I had decided that I was not going to gain the "freshman 15." Growing up, I participated in every sport imaginable ... except soccer for some reason. I did gymnastics, which kinda made me one freakishly muscular little girl. I played softball basketball, volleyball, swim team, dance ... you name it. Since I'm pretty vertically challenged (all of 5'2" on a good day), the height-dominated sports kind of fell by the wayside as I got older. I didn't think I was good enough at softball to make the team in high school, so I found myself running cross country. I had always enjoyed running during the warm-up for other sports, and I actually liked running the mile in gym class. And, bonus, at my high school, cross country didn't have tryouts! Anybody who was crazy enough to pick running as their sport had a spot on the team. So that's what I chose to do.I ran during the season, and during the track season as well, but on the off seasons from those sports I basically didn't keep up with it at all. I'd run every once in a while over the summers, but probably not enough to really stay in shape or get any better the following year. So every year it was like starting over from the beginning. I had always hovered around a personal best of around 22 mins for a 5k.
While my running was inconsistent, my diet was also pretty horrible. I drank coke like it was water, and I distinctly remember getting pop-tarts from the vending machines for my lunches at school just so I didn't have to go through the intimidating mess of the cafeteria line, only to have 10 mins to scarf down whatever plate of shit was being served that day. So, yeah, it was either pop-tarts or a giant no-bake cookie from the sweets booth at school, just around the corner from the main cafeteria. Oh, and of course, a coke to wash it down with. Much better, right?
Surprisingly, I wasn't overweight. Obviously though, it kind of started to catch up with me. Going in to college, I still wasn't overweight, but when I'd get ready to go out with friends, I just didn't feel good about the way my clothes fit or how I looked in the mirror. Like I said before, I decided I wasn't going to gain the "freshman 15," and that I was, in fact, going to try to lose a bit of weight and get healthy. So, I began to run more consistently. This is when I really started to fall in love with running. There was an amazing trail system right off campus, so I'd go 3, 4, 5 days a week until I built up to running 6 days a week, every week. I also started trying to eat healthier. I'd try to get salads more often (though looking back, I know the toppings that I chose probably weren't the best!), I'd try not to get cookies or ice cream after every meal. And I switched to diet coke. But I'd still indulge every once in a while with taco bell after a night out or an ice-cream date with my roommates. By the end of the year, I had managed to lose a few pounds.
It was the summer after my freshman year where, looking back, things started to get a little bit too intense. That summer, I worked my way up to running literally 8-10 miles a day. If I didn't hit that mark, I'd feel like I hadn't done enough. I'd still allow myself one rest day a week, but every other day, if I couldn't make it to the gym or to the park for a run, I'd get really anxious and kind of pissy with everybody around me. I, of course, lost even more weight. I got down to about 103 lbs. I remember thinking maybe I could get down to 100. Seeing that number now, typing it out and making it real, well, it scares me. I realize now that I was essentially heading down the path to an eating disorder. Or, if I'm being really honest with myself, I know in my heart that I did have a disordered relationship with exercise and food. I absolutely did.
During the fall of my sophomore year, I set my 5k PR, 20:12. I mean, running 8-10 miles a day will do that for a girl. But was it worth it? I also remember that through that fall semester I really continued to decrease my caloric intake. We had a subway just across the street from our dorm, so I'd have a 6" sub for lunch nearly every day, but that was it. I'd still have a bagel and fruit for lunch and dinner at the dining hall with friends (often a salad), but it just wasn't enough food.
Luckily for me, and for my body, that spring I had a really tough semester at school. See, I was in the journalism school, and we had to do a semester for a local newspaper. I wrote for the sports beat, so I got to talk to a lot of amazing runners at the university (it was awesome because my editors let me sort of create my own niche and write solely about the university's cross country and track and field programs), but I'm an intensely introverted person, so this put me so far outside of my comfort zone that I basically ate more out of anxiety. Most the time it was still relatively healthy choices, or what I thought was healthy at the time. But I still gained a little bit of weight that semester. I'd say I was back up to 107-110.
And so it went. I continued to love running throughout college. I even ran my first marathon the summer after my sophomore year. I went to the rec center as often as I could, which wasn't hard to do because it was, at the time, one of the best university rec centers in the country. I took spin classes, tried to lift at least 2 times a week, and generally solidified my interest in striving for health and feeling fit. I worked out a lot more than I do now, but I also realized how close I was to reaalllly going off the deep end that summer after freshman year, so I never quite let myself go to that level of intensity again.
I've blabbed on about myself and my running for far too long. I swear these posts will eventually have a point that I'm trying to get to! Essentially I want to address the "restrictions" of this Paleo lifestyle challenge that I'm participating in. But I think my personal back story with fitness and food is a huge part of how I feel about the "restrictions" and what my goals are as far as participating in the challenge in the first place. So stay tuned!
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